Saturday, March 20, 2010
Monday, January 25, 2010
I have been wanting to update this post for about a week or so. The problem is that I didn't quite know how to say what I'm feeling. Also, I feel kinda overwhelmed with the stuff that has happened over the past 3 or 4 months and most of it has been a continuation of the most previous post.
I like to feel like I am able to explain some of the things that happen to me rationally but sometimes I can't. Recently, some things that happened are soo out of the ordinary and so beyond my imagination that I can't even begin to wrap my head around them. Honestly, part of me feels like it would just be better to try to forget all about them but I can't decide if that's the right thing to do. I'm know I'm being vague, that is my intention. I'm not trying spill my life on this thing. I'm just using this whole blog thing to help me sort out my thoughts and help me to think through things way more clearly than my clouded mind can.
Sticking to my goal of this blog, I'm keeping this thing about Christ. I'm not gonna blow up my own blog writing about selfish things revolving all about me me me. I'm trying to present these things in such a way that I can understand how God is working in certain tough situations. I know way more than ever how God has reasons behind everything. The problem is, however, that the good isn't always so evident and clear in the moment of the tough situation(s). I want to be honest here and this is undoubtably the reason for my current state of overwhelmingness (is that a word??) and confusion is that I haven't been in the Word daily like I've wanted to be. Part of the reason is that this situation has pushed me away from God (yeah I'm being vague...I'll explain more in future posts). I think it is only fair to me and my readers (as if anyone reads this thing lol...but seriously, I really don't care if anyone reads this)...ok ok ok, back on topic. I think it's only fair that I get in the word over this before I really start to ask questions for self-discovery. Through the Word and prayer is the only way God is gonna speak to me (although I wish he had some form of tangible communication I.e. facebook, texting, a megaphone, etc.). However, this isn't the only thing I'm going through. I'm also trying to figure out why people act the way they do (like in the workplace) and why this world works the way it does. That sounds ambiguous but it's hard to explain. I'll talk more about it later as soon as I slowly begin to sort it all out in my head (lol).
Anyway, that's enough for now. I just felt really led to update before I went to bed (don't believe what the time says at the bottom of this post...I know its not gonna be right). The time is about 12:12am so if it says 4:27am, don't think I'm some kind of insomniac lol.
I like to feel like I am able to explain some of the things that happen to me rationally but sometimes I can't. Recently, some things that happened are soo out of the ordinary and so beyond my imagination that I can't even begin to wrap my head around them. Honestly, part of me feels like it would just be better to try to forget all about them but I can't decide if that's the right thing to do. I'm know I'm being vague, that is my intention. I'm not trying spill my life on this thing. I'm just using this whole blog thing to help me sort out my thoughts and help me to think through things way more clearly than my clouded mind can.
Sticking to my goal of this blog, I'm keeping this thing about Christ. I'm not gonna blow up my own blog writing about selfish things revolving all about me me me. I'm trying to present these things in such a way that I can understand how God is working in certain tough situations. I know way more than ever how God has reasons behind everything. The problem is, however, that the good isn't always so evident and clear in the moment of the tough situation(s). I want to be honest here and this is undoubtably the reason for my current state of overwhelmingness (is that a word??) and confusion is that I haven't been in the Word daily like I've wanted to be. Part of the reason is that this situation has pushed me away from God (yeah I'm being vague...I'll explain more in future posts). I think it is only fair to me and my readers (as if anyone reads this thing lol...but seriously, I really don't care if anyone reads this)...ok ok ok, back on topic. I think it's only fair that I get in the word over this before I really start to ask questions for self-discovery. Through the Word and prayer is the only way God is gonna speak to me (although I wish he had some form of tangible communication I.e. facebook, texting, a megaphone, etc.). However, this isn't the only thing I'm going through. I'm also trying to figure out why people act the way they do (like in the workplace) and why this world works the way it does. That sounds ambiguous but it's hard to explain. I'll talk more about it later as soon as I slowly begin to sort it all out in my head (lol).
Anyway, that's enough for now. I just felt really led to update before I went to bed (don't believe what the time says at the bottom of this post...I know its not gonna be right). The time is about 12:12am so if it says 4:27am, don't think I'm some kind of insomniac lol.
Monday, October 26, 2009
God IS Able
So Im really sorry that I havent updated this blog in a long time. To be honest, I completely forgot that I had a blog. Kinda hard to maintain a blog if you forget you have one. My bad! Im not gonna promise to update this thing because I keep forgetting. What I can do is try harder. Trying harder....that is what this blog post is gonna be about.
For the past couple weeks I have kinda gotten into a routine that I really enjoy...spiritually too. Andrew and I workout at 6 am, I shower at the gym, and then drive to my parking spot at JPJ to wait for the bus that runs at 9:30. During my hour wait, I read. Ive been reading "Too Busy Not to Pray" by Bill Hybels. It is really good! Brian recommended it to me back in March and I just put it in my "to read" list which was already hidded at the very bottom of my "to do" list. Doing absolutely nothing is more important than reading. Looking back...how dumb I was!
From the title, anyone can obviously tell that the book is about prayer. People might think that their prayer life is pretty good and they dont need to read it because its just not that important. That is exactly why I didnt read it. I thought my prayer life was fine. I did it every night before bed, prayed for others first and didnt beg for things like a little kid wanting candy. While reading I realized that what I was praying was sorta scripted. By scripted, I mean that I prayed almost the same thing every night. I meant what I said but it felt kinda transparent. I wanted every word that I said to mean something AND feel 100% confident in it. Just let the big man upstairs take care of everything. I worry about more than I should anyway.
I have to admit that there are some things that I doubt God can do. Dont make fun of me, everyone has probably thought the same thing at some point in their lives. Think about it. When Im praying and I sometimes come across a prayer that seems impossible. I go ahead and pray about it but deep inside me, I find myself thinking there is no way that this prayer will be answered. Im a Christian and have been for years but I always sorta doubt how big and powerful my God is. When I read that certain chapter in the book, I realized how my faith is really lacking. Having faith is a simple concept that seems easy to understand and follow. But if you think about it, it seems almost impossible to trust God all the time and in every situation. There is a 3 word phrase that should be remembered: God is able. This is a phrase Ive seen and heard for a lonnggg time but maybe it never sank in. Honestly, I saw this phrase as the banner on my sister's phone and kinda laughed at it (maybe because I thought my banner God FIRST was better lol) but now I know what it pertains to. Basically, God can do anything. Period. Bottom line. End of story.
For the past couple weeks I have kinda gotten into a routine that I really enjoy...spiritually too. Andrew and I workout at 6 am, I shower at the gym, and then drive to my parking spot at JPJ to wait for the bus that runs at 9:30. During my hour wait, I read. Ive been reading "Too Busy Not to Pray" by Bill Hybels. It is really good! Brian recommended it to me back in March and I just put it in my "to read" list which was already hidded at the very bottom of my "to do" list. Doing absolutely nothing is more important than reading. Looking back...how dumb I was!
From the title, anyone can obviously tell that the book is about prayer. People might think that their prayer life is pretty good and they dont need to read it because its just not that important. That is exactly why I didnt read it. I thought my prayer life was fine. I did it every night before bed, prayed for others first and didnt beg for things like a little kid wanting candy. While reading I realized that what I was praying was sorta scripted. By scripted, I mean that I prayed almost the same thing every night. I meant what I said but it felt kinda transparent. I wanted every word that I said to mean something AND feel 100% confident in it. Just let the big man upstairs take care of everything. I worry about more than I should anyway.
I have to admit that there are some things that I doubt God can do. Dont make fun of me, everyone has probably thought the same thing at some point in their lives. Think about it. When Im praying and I sometimes come across a prayer that seems impossible. I go ahead and pray about it but deep inside me, I find myself thinking there is no way that this prayer will be answered. Im a Christian and have been for years but I always sorta doubt how big and powerful my God is. When I read that certain chapter in the book, I realized how my faith is really lacking. Having faith is a simple concept that seems easy to understand and follow. But if you think about it, it seems almost impossible to trust God all the time and in every situation. There is a 3 word phrase that should be remembered: God is able. This is a phrase Ive seen and heard for a lonnggg time but maybe it never sank in. Honestly, I saw this phrase as the banner on my sister's phone and kinda laughed at it (maybe because I thought my banner God FIRST was better lol) but now I know what it pertains to. Basically, God can do anything. Period. Bottom line. End of story.
Friday, August 7, 2009
Psalm 34
Sorry for the delay, but without further ado, Psalm 34.
I have been reading through Psalm lately and this entire chapter really stood out to me. I think the reason it jumped off the page is because its first verse is something that I really struggle with, "I will praise the Lord at all times, I will constantly sing his praises." This verse sounds sooo easy that its almost laughable that I'm bringing this up. Think about it...How many times do you ALWAYS praise the Lord, no matter what? Yeah, not laughing now are you...didnt think so, lol. I always seem to tell myself that I will praise God in the good times and the bad times. Dont get me wrong, I really do try my best to do this. The problem happens when the good times dont seem to be happening. Kinda hard to praise and stay optimistic when you feel like nothing is going good. If you feel like this, its probably normal...because it's a human reaction. But because it's a human reaction and everyone probably has felt it before, that doesn't mean that you can chalk it up as simply being human. That's an excuse! That's what I was doing...making an excuse. That's not good enough. That's worldly and we need to be above that.
Keep reading. Hope is coming.
The next goes on to talk about some situations in which the Lord has our back. Why does He always seem to catch us? (rhetorical question) We have to look to Him for help and security. Verse 5a says, "Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy..." Verses 4-10 talk alot about fearing the Lord. What exactly is fearing the Lord? Before you google it, click on this because I already did it for you http://www.bibleinfo.com/en/topics/fear-lord. Talk about service with a smile :).
Verse 10 is a sucker punch to the face for me. It is for all those times that my faith fell short and I failed to stick to my Christian ways and show others who I really am. In other words, I thought I was a strong Lion, but God humbled me and showed me that I was really a weak lion. Kinda sucks to be proven wrong by your Creator. Ps. He likes to humble people...dont be stupid!
"Even strong lions sometimes go hungry, but those who trust in the Lord will lack no good thing."
Pps. While Im on this lion subject and you really want to see me dressed as a lion, click on this -> http://www.springhillbaptist.org/Woodbrook-Block-Party.220.0.html. Embarassing!
By the way, if you have been reading my posts about Cowboys4Christ, verses 11-15 support that whole concept. Really awesome how everything ties together huh!!
I guess I've rambled enough. This is all stuff that I'm learning and I'm pleased that I can share with other people in case they have been thinking about the same things or whatever. Remember...this whole bloggy thing is all for God; I would rather not get credit for any of it. I like to make it readable and sorta funny but the purpose is solely for my relationship with God. My goal is to openly talk about whats going on inside my head and sort out all the confusion.
Ok...done. More to come later. I will get better at posting. My bad.
I have been reading through Psalm lately and this entire chapter really stood out to me. I think the reason it jumped off the page is because its first verse is something that I really struggle with, "I will praise the Lord at all times, I will constantly sing his praises." This verse sounds sooo easy that its almost laughable that I'm bringing this up. Think about it...How many times do you ALWAYS praise the Lord, no matter what? Yeah, not laughing now are you...didnt think so, lol. I always seem to tell myself that I will praise God in the good times and the bad times. Dont get me wrong, I really do try my best to do this. The problem happens when the good times dont seem to be happening. Kinda hard to praise and stay optimistic when you feel like nothing is going good. If you feel like this, its probably normal...because it's a human reaction. But because it's a human reaction and everyone probably has felt it before, that doesn't mean that you can chalk it up as simply being human. That's an excuse! That's what I was doing...making an excuse. That's not good enough. That's worldly and we need to be above that.
Keep reading. Hope is coming.
The next goes on to talk about some situations in which the Lord has our back. Why does He always seem to catch us? (rhetorical question) We have to look to Him for help and security. Verse 5a says, "Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy..." Verses 4-10 talk alot about fearing the Lord. What exactly is fearing the Lord? Before you google it, click on this because I already did it for you http://www.bibleinfo.com/en/topics/fear-lord. Talk about service with a smile :).
Verse 10 is a sucker punch to the face for me. It is for all those times that my faith fell short and I failed to stick to my Christian ways and show others who I really am. In other words, I thought I was a strong Lion, but God humbled me and showed me that I was really a weak lion. Kinda sucks to be proven wrong by your Creator. Ps. He likes to humble people...dont be stupid!
"Even strong lions sometimes go hungry, but those who trust in the Lord will lack no good thing."
Pps. While Im on this lion subject and you really want to see me dressed as a lion, click on this -> http://www.springhillbaptist.org/Woodbrook-Block-Party.220.0.html. Embarassing!
By the way, if you have been reading my posts about Cowboys4Christ, verses 11-15 support that whole concept. Really awesome how everything ties together huh!!
I guess I've rambled enough. This is all stuff that I'm learning and I'm pleased that I can share with other people in case they have been thinking about the same things or whatever. Remember...this whole bloggy thing is all for God; I would rather not get credit for any of it. I like to make it readable and sorta funny but the purpose is solely for my relationship with God. My goal is to openly talk about whats going on inside my head and sort out all the confusion.
Ok...done. More to come later. I will get better at posting. My bad.
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Faith, Hope, Love....and Trust?
So, I really want to apologize about not posting in a really stinkin long time. There were several times where I read something in the Bible that I really wanted to share and I told myself that I would do it....but I never got around to it. But the reason that I never got around to it was because I have to admit that I have had a very rough past 2 or 3 weeks which kinda deferred my attention to the struggle that was at hand, trust.
Recently, one of my current roommates really felt that he needed to get rid of some baggage that had really been holding him back in his Christan walk. He admitted that he had the tendancy to not be truthful in certain situations. Honestly, I had already kinda picked up on these in consistencies but I didnt at all think about how much these truths was going to hurt me. Im not going to tell yall what all these truths are because the entire world doesnt need to know and that is not the point of this blog post. Long story short, a friend lied to me about alot of things, that come to find out, made a bad situation that I was already dealing with, about 10 times worse. That is about as easy as I could put it.
I can't deny the fact that I was having a really hard time forgiving, but I have realized that I have to or the friendship may be ruined. He asked me a couple days ago, "How could you ever be my friend after all this?" In the whole grand scheme of things, it is not worth it to be rightfully mad at someone for a really long time just to lose a friendship. Trust was broken but it is being rebuilt. Also, I have to show him the type of love that the world wouldn't show. Going back to the whole Cowboys4Christ thing, I have to be an example not when I want to be but all the time.
In the next couple days, I will try to do my best to post more.
Recently, one of my current roommates really felt that he needed to get rid of some baggage that had really been holding him back in his Christan walk. He admitted that he had the tendancy to not be truthful in certain situations. Honestly, I had already kinda picked up on these in consistencies but I didnt at all think about how much these truths was going to hurt me. Im not going to tell yall what all these truths are because the entire world doesnt need to know and that is not the point of this blog post. Long story short, a friend lied to me about alot of things, that come to find out, made a bad situation that I was already dealing with, about 10 times worse. That is about as easy as I could put it.
I can't deny the fact that I was having a really hard time forgiving, but I have realized that I have to or the friendship may be ruined. He asked me a couple days ago, "How could you ever be my friend after all this?" In the whole grand scheme of things, it is not worth it to be rightfully mad at someone for a really long time just to lose a friendship. Trust was broken but it is being rebuilt. Also, I have to show him the type of love that the world wouldn't show. Going back to the whole Cowboys4Christ thing, I have to be an example not when I want to be but all the time.
In the next couple days, I will try to do my best to post more.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
A Spiritual Gem
I wanted to post the passage that "Cowboys 4 Christ" is derived from...2 Corinthians 6:3-13. These verses are just really amazing! Verses 3-5 highlight the basis of our ministry...to live in such a way that we do not hinder other people's spiritual development and we patiently endure struggles and hardships of every kind. Verses 6-9 document the struggles that Paul endured. Verse 10 is one of my favorites in this passages and I love how it reads: "Our hearts ache, but we always have joy. We are poor, but we give spiritual riches to others. We own nothing, and yet we have everything." This verse really induces humility and really helps me to put things into perspective. I still struggle to be a Cowboy4Christ and don't think that I have everything figured out, but I am making it a conscious effort. As long as I strive to be the best I can be for Christ, I feel like I can be a leader and a gem in a world that may not always be so bright. Challenge me to be the best I can!
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Cowboys 4 Christ
For the past 2 months, I have seen a couple of my friends, Brian and Andrew, make a committment to themselves to hold a high standard of their actions. They gave this committment a name, Black Panther. I was never a fan of the name which kinda made me not so fond of the idea but I made the committment anyway (because I knew this would help me grow spiritually). Andrew agreed to make the committment with me but we would call it Cowboys for Christ because I wasn't fond of the Black Panther name (we are both Cowboys fans and we know that Jason Witten, Tony Romo, and Sam Hurd are leaders on the football field, lol). Months later, I found myself not adhering to my committment. I also found that my Spiritual life was struggling. What I was doing was making the committment but not making it a daily conscious effort. I wasn't so sure I could make every single thought, idea, comment, action, etc. acceptable to God. I have always wanted to show others I was a Christian by my actions and leadership, but I realized that I couldn't cut corners. If it is worth doing, it is worth doing completely and wholeheartedly! I AM making Cowboys for Christ real in my life...starting NOW! Cowboys for Christ will make me a complete man of God which is what I strive to do. I am excited to see how much I will grow now that I have all my ducks in a row, so to speak, LOL.
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